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my corner of the worldit may be small, but there's always room for one more! :0) 2月14日 14th Feb 2007WOW, I havn't been here forever. I'm sure some of you can vouch for that! Meggars? summer? Heidi? you know how long its been huh.
I must say I really miss you guys and all the cool talks and huge luaghs we used to have on fusion. But hey, things change huh.
I'm in my second year at Bible College now for those of you that didnt know. Its been great. When i first moved hear at the start of last year I was absolutly terried fied, change is a thing that I dont handle to well and uncertainty makes we nervous, but I've grown a lot just in being and in making the move to come.
I have made some truely awesome friends that i'm sure I will keep for life.
The course that I'm doing is a diploma in Biblical studies, focussing on youth ministry co-joint with a diploma in outdoor recreation instruction and I'm reallly loving it. I cant wait to get back into it again after being away for the summer working in a strawberry packhouse.
I hope some of the old gang are around and we can catch up sometime.
Jeff 4月13日 All going wellhey everybody, man i havnt beenm on here in like forever!!!
just a short message to say all is going well.
Im at bible collage doing a diploma in biblical studies and a certificate in outdoor recreation insruction!! i will be a fully qualified outdoor insructer when im done, how cool is that!! at the moment we are doing rock climbing, abseiling, and white water kayaking. then we do sea kayaking, caving ,mountaineering, and bush navigation. and little bits of other stuff.
its heaps of fun and ive made some really great friends!!
love you all and hope all is well with everyone of you.
God Bless, Jeff 12月11日 all finishedwell we had the last show of the pantomime today, it went really well. its a bit wierd now to think that its all over, I think im going to find myself getting bored and lonely now that i wont be out every night practising and all that. i was really starting to get used to seeing everyone all the time, and i particularly enjoyed the company of a couple of the cast and will miss spending so much time with them, but oh well, end of a chapter i guess, time for the next one. 12月6日 Hello.....Wow, I havnt been here in a long time, almost a month!, and to think at one stage I was totally addicted ;o)
anywho, everything is going good, Ive been quite busy with pantimime practice, Im the rat, in Rindercella. its a bunch of fun, we have done four shows and have four more to go later this week.
um... oh yeah, Ive applied for a course at bible collage, its a two piece course, it runs for two years, half biblical studies, half training to be a outdoor adventure activities instructor, groovy huh, kinda scary too, I havnt heard back from then yet, shouldnt be too long though, if anyone thinks of it, can they pray for me, I dont really handle change to well, but i really want to step into whatever God has for me, and I know im not going to find it staying in the job im in. 11月8日 direction for lifeaarrrggghhhh!!!! what do I dooo???
I've come to the conclusion that I dont know where im going and am feeling a bit lost i suppose, there are pleanty of options if i think about it, but I dont really know what I WANT to do, and to be honest im absolutly terrified of change, why is that anyway?? well I have a fair idea. here's what I just read from a book.
If a man succeeds in securing his life against all risk, he'll wind up in a cocoon of self-protection and wonder all the while why he is suffocating. If it doesnt work, he curses God, redoubles his efforts and his blood pressure. When you look at the structure of the false self that men tend to create, it always revolves around two themes: seizing upon some sort of competence, and rejecting anything that cannot be controlled.
A mans life becomes an adventure, the whole thing takes on a transcendant purpose when He releases control in exchange for the recovery of the dreams of his heart. Sometimes those dreams are buried so deep and it takes some unearthing to get to them. We pay attention to our desire. Often the clues are in our past, in those moments when we found ourselves loving what we were doing. the details and circumstances change as we grow, but the theme remains the same.
If you had permission to do what you really want to do, what would you do? Dont ask 'how', that will cut your desire off at the knees. 'how' is never the right question, 'how' is a faithless question. it means "unless I can see my way clearly I wont venture forth." When the angel told Zecheriah that his ancient wife would bear him a son named john, zecheriah asked 'how' and was struck dumb for it. 'How' is Gods department. He is asking you 'what'. what is written on your heart? what makes you come alive? if you could do what youve always wanted to do, 'what' would it be?/ You see a mans calling is written on his true heart, and he discovers it when he enters the frontier of his deep desirs. to paraphrase Gil Ballie, "dont ask yourself what the world needs, ask yourself what makes you come alive because what the worlds needs are men who have come alive.
Now, that is all very true and totally awesome and inspiring etc... but what when you dont even know what the 'what' is??!!! and how do I find it?? and why am I so scared to look, to give up somthing stable to find somthing better, rather than just settle (again) "Dear Lord, help me, please" 11月2日 'The search'Well, its been a fair while since i put up a deep thought provoking blog, so, as I was reading this last night I decided I would put it on here, this is taken from the 'wild at heart journal'... speaking about women.
What else is it we are seeking from the beauty? what is that ache that we are trying to assuage with her? Mercy, comfort, beauty, ecstasy - in a word, God. I'm serious. what we are looking for is God
There was a time when Adam drank deeply from the source of all Love. He - our first father and archetype - lived in an unbroken communion with the most captivating, beautiful, and intoxicating Source of Life in the universe. Adam had God. Now yes, it was not good for man to be alone, and God in his humility gave us Eve, allowed us to need her as well. But somthing happened at the Fall; somthing shifted. Eve took the place of God in a mans life. Let me explain. Adam was not decieved by the serpent. Did you know that? Pual makes it clear in 1 Timothy 2:4 - Adam did not fall because he was decieved. His sin was different; in some ways, it was more serious in that he did it with open eyes. We do not know how long it lasted, but there was a moment in Eden when Eve was fallen and Adam was not; she had eaten, but he yet had a choice. I belive somthing took place in Adams heart that went somthing like this: I have lost my ezer kenegdo, my soul mate, the most vital companion I've known. I dont know what life will be like, but I know I cannot live without her.
Adam chose Eve over God
Look at all the art, poetry, music, drama devoted to the beautiful woman, Listen to the language men use to describe her. Watch the powerful obsession at work. What else can this be but worship? Men come into this world without the God who was our deepest joy, our ecstasy. Aching for we know not what, we meet Eve's daughters and we are history. She is the closet thing we've ever encountered, the pinnicle of creation, the very embodiment of God's beauty and mystery and tenderness and allure. And what goes out to her is not just our longing for Eve, but our longing for God as well. A man without his true love, his life, his God, will find another. What better substitute than Eve's daughters? Nothing else in all creation even comes close
Interesting huh??, sure makes me think thats for sure, why cant I just tell myself that what I'm really looking for, and what I truely need and desire is a better relationship with God? and why is that so hard to come by?
I do believe that God has someone out there for me, but if im expecting her to fill this 'ache' in me, then I am expecting to much, she will fill a certain amount of it of course, I believe there is a 'spouse shaped hole' as well as a God shaped one, but I need to have the majority of that ache fulfilled by God. and why isnt it so obvious to think about it like that? it does say in Genesis that 'God created them BOTH in HIS IMAGE, man AND woman He created them'... so therefore, all those great qualities that we find in woman HAD to come from God, Its part of His personality and character. there is a the masculine side and the feminine side, i guess that is why a couple are meant to complete each other, the two make one completely whole unit. 10月25日 off to the dochmmm, I nicked this 'preface' idea off Summer's blog, great idea Summer!
preface: I was born absolutly covered in exzema (if thats how you spell it) and then when I was about four I was completly healed of it!! then about a year and a half ago, it showed up again in little patches on my forearms and face, it wasnt so bad, and after a while went away.....then, it showed up in huge ugly patches on my thighs and calves. eewwwwwwwwww....
present: about three weeks ago, the skin on my calves were that munted (mostly from my relentless night time scratching escapades) that my legs both got infected from the knee down, and they swelled up huge! anyway, I went to the doc and he gave me some anti-biotics and some other drugs of some sort and now theyre almost looking normal again, but..... and this is the stink part, when i was there I asked if they could run some tests, so the took some urine and a whole bunch of blood and sent me home, today, they rang me up and said my colesterole was a bit high, I thought 'suprise, suprise, im a bachelor, what do you expect, not that i eat REALLY badly, but I dont exactly eat brilliantly' then she said i have a high cobalt level, cobolt is an element that comes out into the air when you are grinding tungstun carbide with a diamond carbide grinding wheel, and apparently is really really bad for you, AND cause skin conditions, well, well, well, looks like we might be onto somthing, THEN she said a couples of other things that are a bit high BUT she wouldnt say what they were. hmmmmmmm, interesting. oh well, so im off to see the doc tomorrow. hopefully he doesnt tell me to stop eating pies!!!!! muwahahahhahahahaha. nah, s'pose i'll have to if he does, stink.
Thank you LORD for you promise that 'it IS NOT what goes into a man that makes him unclean, but what comes out.' wooohoooooo |
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